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The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman outlines five ways to express and experience love that Chapman refers to as “love languages” including: receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service (devotion), and physical touch. Examples are given from his counseling practice, as well as questions to help determine one’s own love languages.
Chapman’s book claims that the list of five love languages is exhaustive. According to this theory, each person has one primary and one secondary love language. Chapman spent a professional lifetime counseling couples and repeatedly observed the same patterns. Chapman suggests that to discover another person’s love language, one must observe the way they express love to others, and analyze what they complain about most often and what they request from their significant other most often. He theorizes that people tend to naturally give love in the way that they prefer to receive love, and better communication between couples can be accomplished when one can demonstrate caring to the other person in the love language the recipient understands.
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